A disgusting insult to any genre fan.
If you are a lover of horror cinema then please heed my warning. There are very few films that I will beg you not to see, this is one of them. But above this, know that:
This film is a lie.
Every thing contained in the film's advertising is a lie, it is not scary, it is not shocking and it isn't even complete. I feel no shame in listing this review as 'Non-spoiler', because there is nothing to spoil. This is among the most predictable and generic horror films I have ever seen. Nothing of originality, nothing to offer a veteran horror fan, and even less for a newcomer to the genre. When I rate a film 1 star, I mean to say that not only does the film have no value, it has anti-value. It causes nothing but harm to its peers and embarrasses an entire community of films by association.
The film's acting is a joke. Delivered with the passion of an Ikea lamp, and with the originality of bad haircut. The 'main characters' are unlikable assholes, portrayed as much through the dialogue as the acting. The film's 'script' is a dirty, sodden dishcloth, every jump-scare is a stain upon it.
This horrendously trite slice of nothingness failed to even achieve an 85 min runtime, likely because they avoided inconveniences such as character or plot. The film cares so little for its audience that it even insults the .01% of said audience who enjoyed it. It does this by failing to end. The film has NO ENDING. The last frame of the film is a link to a now defunct web domain (the studio was so cheap it only paid for 6 months on the website, a website referenced in every version of the film!).
This crap surpasses Frankenstein (1994) as the worst horror film I have ever reviewed. It's monumental financial success is a testament to how we have all been played for cattle, steered into the corporate slaughterhouse and reduced to chowder.
This film is a lie.
Every thing contained in the film's advertising is a lie, it is not scary, it is not shocking and it isn't even complete. I feel no shame in listing this review as 'Non-spoiler', because there is nothing to spoil. This is among the most predictable and generic horror films I have ever seen. Nothing of originality, nothing to offer a veteran horror fan, and even less for a newcomer to the genre. When I rate a film 1 star, I mean to say that not only does the film have no value, it has anti-value. It causes nothing but harm to its peers and embarrasses an entire community of films by association.
The film's acting is a joke. Delivered with the passion of an Ikea lamp, and with the originality of bad haircut. The 'main characters' are unlikable assholes, portrayed as much through the dialogue as the acting. The film's 'script' is a dirty, sodden dishcloth, every jump-scare is a stain upon it.
This horrendously trite slice of nothingness failed to even achieve an 85 min runtime, likely because they avoided inconveniences such as character or plot. The film cares so little for its audience that it even insults the .01% of said audience who enjoyed it. It does this by failing to end. The film has NO ENDING. The last frame of the film is a link to a now defunct web domain (the studio was so cheap it only paid for 6 months on the website, a website referenced in every version of the film!).
This crap surpasses Frankenstein (1994) as the worst horror film I have ever reviewed. It's monumental financial success is a testament to how we have all been played for cattle, steered into the corporate slaughterhouse and reduced to chowder.
Originally posted 23/10/14 on IMDB.com, as part of HALLOWEEN HORROR REVIEWS 2014
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